


The Illusion Of Choice

by AnonAngstAuthor



Category: Batman (Movies - Nolan)
Genre: F/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-15
Updated: 2017-11-23
Packaged: 2018-11-01 06:07:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10915887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonAngstAuthor/pseuds/AnonAngstAuthor
Summary: "I'll always love ya', y'know?" Her big blue eyes twinkled up at him. Jack didn't think it was possible for something to shine so bright in the darkness.He caressed her cheek as gently as he could with calloused fingers."You say that as if you ever had a choice, Jen."





	1. Come on, Jeannie

**Author's Note:**

> Another Joker origin story, that I'll take eight years to finish. Why do I do this to myself. Oh God, why.
> 
> Jeannie: Jack Napier's wife made an appearance in The Killing Joke. They didn't really give her a last name, and to avoid being accused of copying someone else, I chose to use the surname Lovat.
> 
> disclaim: I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THESE CHARACTERS-BESIDES MY OWN TAKE ON JEANNIE-THEY ARE CREATIONS OF NOLAN'S VERSE

_She'd met him in fifth grade._

When gossiping with other girls, the way they saw in popular, high school romance flicks, was _the_ trend, and _boys_ were no longer icky, cootie infested, burdens.

_She'd met him in the summer._

Just weeks before break, when children began getting rowdy and excited to finally be out of the hellhole they called school, and the wind no longer felt as though it were pricking her with thousands of needles, when it blew.

 _That was when she'd met_ **_him_ ** _._

"That guy over there has been staring at you _all_ class."

Jeannie looked up at Diana, confused. Even more so when her friend of four years gestured over towards the other side of the classroom. Her wandering blue eyes met _his_ with ease, and she paused for a moment. The inky pools seemed to be piercing into her from across the room but Jeannie shook her head at the notion and continued searching for the mystery guy her friend had been speaking of.

When she came up short, she sighed, and looked back over at her friend with a raised eyebrow. "What _guy_?" Diana didn't answer immediately, instead choosing to circle in the next question on her worksheet, before she decided to look back up. Diana glanced around again, and rolled her eyes in annoyance.

" _God_ , I _swear_ the dumb blonde stereotype was _made_ by you sometimes. The only _guy_ that's _looking_ at you, Jeannie." The girl's olive, silly band infested, wrist gestured toward the opposite side of the dull room once more, modestly. Something the clumsy, Jeannette Lovat, could never hope to achieve. With a sigh, the petite blonde let her gaze wander among the class full of students, only managing to catch the calculating dark brown eyes, once more.

Jeannie gave up, quietly. Turning back to Diana and dropping her attention back to her boring science worksheet. Only a few minutes passed in silence between the two girls, before Diana looked back up, her almond shaped eyes narrowed at her friend, inquisitively. "Ya' see him?" The silence answered her question better than Jeannie ever could have, and Diana let out an aggravated groan.

"Come _on_ , Jeannie, not even _you_ are _that_ oblivious." But she was, it seemed, because she had _no_ clue _what_ on Earth, Diana Lawrence was talking about. The young Jeannie continued scribbling in answers until the pencil was tugged from her hand. Jeannie rested her head on her chin lazily and huffed at the girl sitting across from her.

" _What_?" It was said a little more venomously than she'd meant, the bite in the word hadn't been necessary, but the sass had been as uncontrollable as always, it was something that was all around, _Jeannie_.

"Curly hair, dirty blonde, dark eyes, tanned skin." Diana began listing off things but Jeannie simply couldn't accept the thought that _he'd_ been doing _anything_ other than _accidentally_ looking over when she had, a coincidence. "You _knooow_ , the _reeeeal_ tall kid, doesn't talk?" How her friend had gone an _entire_ year in a class and not learned everyone's name was a true puzzle to Jeannie.

"Jack Napier. Yeah, I _know_." She paused and tapped her bitten nail against the desk. "It was _probably_ just an accident, though?" The resounding scoff made Jeannie want to snarl something she'd later regret at Diana, but she chose to just continue talking instead. "He was probably just _zoned out_ , anyway."

Diana shrugged, her braided pony tail following the action, sweeping back behind her shoulder. She ignored her friend's clipped tone, wisely, and chose to change the topic. "You've _gotta'_ let me borrow those earrings sometime, Jen. They make your neck look _so_ much smaller." The corner of the blonde's mouth quirked up, at it's own accord and Jeannette crossed her arms over her chest, leaning back in her seat.

"Only if _you_ let _me_ borrow some your _new_ bands." The tanned girl threw a braid over her shoulder and laughed with Jeannie.

" _Deal_."

 _Everyone_ knew of the surname Napier, in Gotham city it was a brand. The man, John Napier being the very reason of that trademark. He was the corrupt police chief, that basically let the mafia take the city by storm. He was a junkie, too useless, and drugged out of his mind to even lock up a _cat burglar._ But, nobody would do _anything_ , the man had the charisma, and charm of a snake. _Slime balls_ flocked to his side, people like _him_ , longed to be with their own kind . The _boy_ , however, the bastard son, that was, _Jack Napier_. He was avoided, like a nuisance, a _plague_. Teachers and students alike, avoided the child, in fear they would catch the abuse _he'd_ been given all his life, by simply breathing the same air.

Jack Napier was alone in the world, free from any physical contact, aside from a fist to the face. Anyone who knew what was good for them would stay away. It was an unspoken rule, a _law_ among the society within Gotham, to keep from the trouble that followed him, loomed over him, like a sullen cloud.

Jeannette Lovat had never been _good_ at following rules.

 _Especially_ when people told her specifically, _not_ to do something, it became like an itch. An _itch_ that she didn't have the will power _not_ to scratch, she figured the result was always interesting enough.

Truth be told, Jack Napier, had never _truly_ caught her eye, the itch hadn't been there before. Not until, she'd caught _his_ eye. Because, each time she'd felt his eyes on her, her curiosity grew. Whenever the burning feeling from his stare dissipated, she'd risk a glance in his direction, he was always alone, head down, posture slouched, and _only_ if you looked past the cold glare, could you see the true frown that weighed at the corner of his mouth.

Jeannie had always liked studying people.

So, studying Jack Napier was quite the treat when she got the chance. _But_ , she made sure to keep her blue eyes adverted when _his_ weren't.

Until, she got bored of _that_ , which, _in all honesty_ , wasn't for very long at all. Jeannie figured she'd seen enough, after the third day of just _observing_ , to do any more, she decided she'd have to get _closer_.

She did. _Again_ , modesty wasn't her 'strong' suit. Not at _all_. Many times her blunt, forward behavior had sent people running, far away, where she _preferred_ them, anyhow, if she were being truthful. But, she promised herself she _wouldn't_ scare, Jack, she'd be civil, and… _polite_.

Flinging herself in the seat across from him, _probably_ _hadn't_ been a good start, she could admit. His dark gaze was unwavering as it was unnerving, and he didn't flinch away like _most_ people would. That made her, _somewhat,_ happy, she threw him a toothy smile and rested her chin on her palm.

" _Hiiii._ "

 _Nothing_.

Not that she'd expected much from him, but her smile didn't drop in the slightest. "My name's Jeannette, but _most_ people just call me, Jeannie." Her cheeks were beginning to hurt from the pressure, and Jeannie imagined she probably looked something like the cheshire cat, by now. So, she let it rest, into more of a natural smirk on her cherry popsicle, stained lips. Jeannie watched him swallow, his dark gaze still intimidatingly blank.

"Yeah, I _know_." It was a weird thing, hearing someone's voice for the first time. Jeannie had _assumed_ it would be many things, croaky, and prepubescent, or high and strained. But, the monotonous lilt had her eyebrows raising, along with the deep timbers that weren't _quite_ that of a teenager, but certainly _not_ of an ten year old, either.

Jeannie grunted, miffed, and began tapping her fingers against the table, slowly. " _Well_ , Mr. I _know_ , this would _normally_ be the part where you tell me your _name_ so we can continue having a conversation like _civil_ human beings." Jeannie mentally kicked herself. The sass had slipped, once again, from it's leash, and into a sentence that she had _meant_ to be friendly.

Still, she waited.

"Yeah, I _know_." He repeated. But, Jeannie refused to break eye contact until he continued, which he _did_ , with some coaxing. "What makes you think _I_ wanna' converse with _you_?" And then, she wished he _hadn't_.

"Well, if _not,_ then ya' _sure_ know how to send some pretty _big_ mixed signals, _bud_. With all the _googly eyed_ staring, and what not." Jeannie huffed and crossed her arms, fuming to herself, that she'd wasted her time, her niceness, on some _boy_ who couldn't return the same decency. Just as she readied herself to stand and storm away, he spoke.

"I like your clips."

The surprise must have shown on her face, or perhaps the confusion she felt at what he meant, but either way, he snorted and adjusted his long legs beneath the table more comfortably, right next to her's. Jeannie didn't jump away, but she felt burned, until he waved his hand like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"The things, in your hair?" Jeannie brought her hand up to remember her purple butterfly barrette she'd placed there, that morning. Her mouth formed in an 'o', but the scraggly haired boy who looked more like a stretched out, lanky _teenager_ , than an elementary schooler, continued, crossing his arms, defensively.

"..make it look soft..." Jeannie didn't know how to respond at first, to the unexpected confession, so instead she flashed him another smile, and pretended her freckled cheeks weren't blushing.

"I have another set you could borrow sometime…" She could have smacked herself, she was mortified, but the smirk that split his downcast mouth into a half smile made her want to do it all over again.

There were mortified sounds of various gasps and whispers shared in the large cafeteria and Jeannie didn't need to look to know that it was _pretty much_ the entire school staring at her, and Jack Napier, smiling, and bantering like friends.

It was definitely a _good_ thing that Jeannie Lovat didn't give a _damn_ about what people thought, because once she'd seen the beginning of Jack Napier's smile, she just _knew_ she was gonna' be working from then on to see it, again, and again, and _again_. Even if she lost some companions along the way.

She watched as her usual table of friends glared her way, only Diana offered a small smile to her, along with a wave. Jeannie returned it instantly before turning back to Jack and beaming at his twinkling, russet eyes and kicking his leg away, playfully.

Jeannie Lovat didn't mind one _bit_.


	2. A Taken Man

**_GOTHAM, 2008 (PRESENT DAY)_ **

" _Annnd_ , he _r_ e we _go_."

He was falling.

_Falling._

_Falling._

_Falling._

From the sky? No. No. _No._

That wasn't righ _t_. He was laughing, convulsing, roaring with dark amusement.

From the building! The building in the sky… and if he _kep_ ** _t_** falling…

My, _my_ , what a win! Another ace in the hole, not only would he have Gotham's _precious, white_ knight, but the dark one as well! His laughter died down, when he began drifting.

 _Drifting_.

Up.

U _p_.

 _Up_.

That wasn't _right_. He growled his annoyance, but hid it beneath his continuous string of whooping laughter. When he came face to face with the _Bat_ ma _n_ , he ground his teeth.

So _needy_ , the bat was.

Unfortunately for _him_ , he was a taken man.

Joker giggled.

No sugar for _you,_ Bats _y_.

But, he was _nothing_ if not a _reason_ able _guy_. So, he threw the _rodent_ a bone.

"I think you and _I_ _,_ are destine _d_ to do this, _forever_."

 _Blindness_ wasn't something he suffered from, he could see the Batman search his eyes, as though he were looking for just an _ounce_ of sanity. Of _course_ , it was there!

He wasn't _crazy_. No- _oooo_ , _soon_ the rest would catch up, _too_.

" _What_ did you _do_?"

It was difficult to look at the masked vigilante, upside down, and _spinning_. His arms flew out to balance out his twirls, it still felt like he was falling-what an _odd time_ to dance.

He didn't _mind_ dancing, when the _company_ was good. A smile stretched his scars, wide, and full. There was a break in his voice, as he hummed to himself, a song, the masked man in front of him, couldn't quite place.

" _See_ , mad- _ness_ , as you _know_ , is like gravi- _ty_ _..._ _all_ _-lll_ it takes, _is_ a _li_ -ttle _push_."

His snickering laughter is cut off by the Batman's fist, connecting harshly with his temple.

And, all he saw was _black_.

Bruce stared down at the mad man, from his stiff stance. The Joker's greasy, green locks were fading, and his war paint was flecking off. How _easy_ it would be, to simply wipe off the remaining bits, but, there was no time. The vigilante could hear their footsteps clearly, as though they were in the same room- _luckily_ , the SWAT team was still several floors down.

_Not for long._

The masked man, backed away, moving to blend into the shadows, and observe the scene from afar. _Something_ stopped him. A glimmer in the light, a simple twinkle that burned into his peripheral vision. Bruce turned toward the mysterious flicker, and caught sight of Joker's purple, leather glove, nearly wrinkled all the way to his fingertips. A golden wedding band wrapped around his ring finger. _A perfect fit._

The man felt his eyes widen beneath the heat of his mask, and a choking sound resonated from his chest.

It seemed so _wrong_.

Bruce reached toward it, inspecting the shining object with disbelief. He had chills, racing up and down his spine, uncomfortable quakes inside of his chest, that made his heart skip beats. To _imagine_ the man who had Gotham, practically under his thumb, _corrupt_ , with chaos, and terror… _married_.

The door slammed open, and Batman did the only thing he knew to do;he corrected the glove over Joker's hand, and concealed the ring from view, once more. They'd find it soon, anyway.

The masked vigilante was gone before the SWAT team had even filed into the room.

**_Summer of Fifth Year, 1990_ **

" _Prove it_."

She stomped her foot angrily at the boy that towered over her, he was bulkier than Jack, but shorter by about a foot. His sweaty, dark brown hair, clung to his forehead, and neck, his chubbier looking cheeks, a rosy red, beneath the scorching, summer sun. The boy smelled of grass, and hot, salty air as he panted in her face, his name was _Peter_. He'd proved to be a problem for Jeannie way before she'd even started _talking_ to Jack. The other boys that crowded around her, however, were new.

"Come on _Jeannette_ , if you're _not_ dating that _freak_ , then _kiss_ one of us."

It felt like they'd set her chest on fire, like a open flame meeting a vat of gasoline. Jeannie knew she shouldn't let her temper get the best of her, that _they_ , weren't worth it. But often times, she just couldn't control it. They didn't _know_ Jack, but both boys that stood behind Peter, hovering in the distance, nodded their heads enthusiastically, at his cruel words. The young girl didn't understand, why people felt the need to be so mean, and hostile, to what that they didn't understand. She happened to think Jack was exceptionally interesting, heaps more than the judge-mental trio that stood in front of her.

Peter was suddenly _very_ close, too close. He was inhaling in the air as she exhaled it, just the _near_ proximity made her feel sick, and suffocated. Jeannie could practically see his wheezing rasps of breath as they came out, and even with all the space she had around her, the girl felt trapped. Peter continued to edge closer, and panic seized her chest, fusing with her fury. In a moment of gripping distress, Jeannie drew her fist back, and cringed as the feeling of his nose cracking, vibrated through her hand, and up her arm. The boy fell back, landing on the ground, his pudgy fingers clenched at his bleeding nostrils.

Behind her, there was a sound, it seemed distant, like a low hum. When Jeannie turned, her blue eyes met those of a deep brown, and she felt something inside her scream in relief. _Jack_. His face remained blank, and aloof, but when his eyes met her own, only feet from where she stood, they danced with passion, and pride. Those eyes burned her.

Suddenly, there were hands gripping her forearms, tightly, between their dirty fingertips, pinching her skin, and roughly dragging her back. At some point, the humming had stopped. Jeannie could hear them, the boys holding her back, breathing raggedly, as though she'd put up a fight-she hadn't. And then, " _Bitch_!" Peter was snarling, his face bloody, and sweatier than before. He charged towards her, yet all Jeannie could do was close her eyes, and hope that it didn't hurt _too_ much.

She waited. Nothing came.

A grunt had the girl opening her eyes. Peter wasn't in front of her, anymore. Jack had steered the stout kid toward himself, by the collar of his shirt, that remained firmly in his clasp. She observed the way he towered over the boy in his hold, and how, not even really trying, he'd nearly gotten Peter to piss himself. Jeannie barely noticed one of Jack's hands disappear into the depths of his, baggy, ripped, denim jeans. A clean clicking sound filled the air, followed by a _swish_. Without further warning, Jack held a switchblade, unyielding, against Peter's jugular.

The tall blonde was calm as he turned toward the two boys that held Jeannie back, his glare only grew darker at their grimy hands that grasped her. The young girl was released, almost instantly, and Jack's gaze was on her, once more. Jeannie wasn't sure, _what_ , exactly, to do. There was something unhinged about the way he looked at her, the way his dark orbs sunk into her's, as though they wanted to drown, there was no looking away from a stare like his. Not until Jack himself decided to break it, his hoarse voice raised to reach her ears, in a chilling, gentle caress.

" _Go_ , Jeannie…Go home."

And, she did.


	3. Last Girl On Earth

**_Ninth Year, 1994_ **

Jeannie giggled girlishly at the feeling of Jack's incoherent murmuring, tickling her ear. He was standing behind her, the two of them waiting in line for their portion of the grubby lunch. His arms were wrapped around her neck in a mock hug, his hands loosely pointing at people as they passed by. The words he spoke, were barely discernible, but it didn't matter, Jeannie leaned into his embrace. It was safe to say, the pair had gotten lost in their own world. The cafeteria chattered about, its volume raising as the seconds ticked on, each student caught up in gossip, and rumor. But Jack, and Jeannie stood, observing, without  _really_ seeing, blind,  _both of them,_  in their own ways. The next time his lips brushed against her ear, he whispered, his voice deep, and hoarse. In response to hearing it, Jeannie cleared her own throat, and nodded, taking his hand, that gestured away in front of her, with a mind of its own. His fingers wrapped around her's, as hot as a furnace, tightening as he spun her in the direction he wanted her to go, the notion of a smirk grazed his lips.

"Just  _where_ are you taking me, Jack Napier? You  _know_ there's no way to leave, they've even got  _teachers_ stationed outside the doors so nobody skips!" Jeannie crossed her arms, her arched eyebrows raising as she tapped her foot. Jack simply rolled his eyes at her, pulling her towards him, swiftly, as he ducked behind the serving counters. Jeannie let out a huff of annoyance, but willingly-if you could  _call_ it that, with him  _dragging_ her-followed behind him as he slipped through a door labeled 'EXIT.' The blinking red sign flickered at her, like some kind of omen of bad luck, against her better judgment, Jeannie continued on, her heart beating erratically in her chest. Jack stopped, halting in his tracks so quickly that she couldn't help but stumble into him, having to clutch onto the back of his grungy, deep red sweater for balance. He turned, and regarded her, the side of his mouth drawn up in sarcastic annoyance. Jeannie snarled at him, before continuing to make a show of wrinkling it in her fists.

Jack couldn't have cared less about his clothing.  _Or_ her two left feet, for that matter.

Later that afternoon,  _long_ after they'd escaped the confines of the prison-like school, and the sun had begun to disappear behind the cloudy horizon, Jeannie dropped her head to lay gently against Jack's shoulder. She closed her eyes to the bright, blinding sunset, and counted the seconds, as they ticked by. The numbers flashed, each a different color, and style, beneath the safety of her eyelids. All the while, Jack clenched his teeth, and tried to ignore the way his chest pleasantly throbbed.

**_GOTHAM, 2008 (PRESENT DAY)_ **

A guard had tried to  _personally_ remove the golden band from the Joker's finger, the ring having caught his greedy eye beneath the buzzing, fluorescent light, and he had failed- _miserably_. Instead, Dan- _the guard_ , had lost a finger,  _three_ ,  _actually_ , to the the ' _patient's_ 'snarled mouth. At the time, The Joker hadn't been wearing his makeup- _they'd turned the hoses on him-_ but, his black eyes had widened, maliciously, as he'd stared, pointedly, into Dan's eyes, bringing the severed finger up, and gliding it across his cheeks…

Dan Stratford had quit, on the spot… and The Joker's smile was as  _crimson_ as ever! How things just  _tended_ to work out in his favor.

A laugh escaped, coming out muffled behind his lips as the guards manhandled him into a straight jacket. "Right on to solitary with you,  _clown_." The boys at Arkham had seemingly forgotten their  _manners_ , but that was  _alright_ , he had no problem what so ever with _jogging their memories_. His eyes shifted from the guard's, traveling down towards his name tag, labeled, 'Hello! My name is, Robert.' He scoffed behind the snarl marring his mouth, before clearing his throat over-exaggeratedly.

"Y'know the name  _Richard_ used to mean  _brave_ , and, uh,  _powerful_ back in the ' _old'_ days," He pauses, his tongue flicking out to meet the corner of his mouth. "… It was used  _so_ commonly that people began to shorten it by saying  _Rick,_  and  _eventually_ they even started  _rhyming_ ," He said this, tilting his head towards the man, his eyes widening like it had been a major detail in his ramblings. " _Which_ is where the nickname  _Dick_ came in.  _Hm_?" His scarred bottom lip jutted out in a fake pout, before his expression cleared, and he chuckled under his breath. " _Or,_ perhaps your parents were just  _compensating_ where you're.. _uh_.. where you're…  _lacking_ ," The Joker managed to lower his eyes to Richard's slacks just before a the guard's night stick was slammed into his gut. Through his coughing, and spluttering laughter he still managed to wheeze out, " _Who knows_?"

Yeah, he'd definitely be showing these pigs a lesson in etiquette…  _For now_ though, well, for  _now_ he'd just dream of his Jeannie.

**_Ninth Year, 1994_ **

" _So_ , Jeremy asked me to go to the  _prom_ with him." Jeannie chirped, slyly looking over her shoulder to gauge Jack's were washing up the last of the dishes they'd dirtied at her house, over lunch. Well,  _Jack_ was washing up dishes,  _she_ was sneaking cherries from the jar while his back was turned, instead of grabbing the rest of the plates on the counter.

All she could really see from the angle she stood at was his back tensing through his t-shirt. Jack's only verbal response was a hum that emanated deep from within his chest, it hung around the room heavily, but Jeannie continued anyhow.

" _Yeah_ … I mean he's a  _senior_ , so it won't  _really_ be a  _thing_ , but,  _I d'unno_ … I thought it could be  _fun_." She wrung her hands together tightly, pushing the sticky jar away from her to turn to him. Jack was already staring at her, the faucet pouring behind him, with his hands gripping the edge of the sink, dark eyes staring her down.

When Jeannie didn't say anything more Jack raised his eyebrows in an unspoken challenge, crossing his arms in front of him. Momentarily, she was distracted by the movement. While Jack was just a freshman in high school he easily towered over anyone, having to be at least six foot, and  _anyone definitely_ included Jeannie, who could still couldn't reach all of the required heights for the rides when the local fair came around. So, to say he was intimidating would be an understatement, but, truthfully, Jack would never hurt her. That's why it was so easy for her to smile cheekily up at him, crossing the room his way.

"It was just a  _thought_ ,  _y'know_?" Jeannie swayed on her feet, in a mock dance. "I mean,  _Tammy_ said it was a good Idea,  _but_ … I'm sure  _you_ could come up with something  _way_ more interesting than some  _stupid._   _Old_.  _Prom_.  _hm_?" She finished, crowding closer to reach around him, and turn the faucet off. When she pulled back, to step away, his arm appeared around her to hold her in place, tugging her closer.

"I don't know if you noticed, but  _school_ dances  _aren't_ really  _my thing_ ,  _Jeannette_." Jeannie slapped his arm playfully at the use of her full name as he grinned down at her. There was something in his eyes though, that told her he wasn't truthfully  _all that happy_. "I'm  _sure_ thatI could  _come up_ with something, though." Jack raised his eyebrows again, this time taking in her reaction to his words.

"Well, that's  _definitely_ good.  _Beeeee_ -cause I would  _much_ rather spend time with  _you_ than any  _other icky boy_ around here." Jeannie tapped gently at his cheek as she finished her sentence, and watched as his mouth twisted wryly in response to her words.

" _Other_ icky boys,  _huh_?" Jack's hands squeezed her sides roughly earning a squeak from her smiling mouth. " _What's this_ I  _hear_ about  _other_ icky boys?" Only when he lowered his head, staring into her eyes as he moved closer to lightly nuzzle his nose against her's, did she see that there was no  _true_ humor in his tone.

" _Oh, Jack_." Jeannie's hands wrapped themselves around his as they pinned her waist, she doodled small, invisible patterns into the skin of his wrists. "I was only  _joking…_   _honest_." Her neck craned, tilted to look up at him at the right angle. "No other _icky boy_  could take  _your_ place. You're my best friend, y'know?" When Jack nodded, Jeannie took her signal to pull away, missing the small pull at the corner of his lips. The hint of a smile she had the ill fortune of missing.

If she had known, she'd have had a fit for not getting to see it.

**_Ninth Year, 1994_ **

Jack tried to pretend he didn't see Jeannie's side eye from across the rotting picnic table.

She'd been staring at him for the past hour, her pale blue eyes hadn't left the side of his face, and while this wouldn't normally irk Jack- _it was only Jeannie, after all_ -he could just  _tell_. There was  _something_ on her mind. Something that had her fingers fidgeting, and teeth gnawing at the inside of her cheeks. Jack grunted, leaning forward with his elbows on the table, chin resting on the palm of his hand.

His immoderate expression of curiosity wasn't easy to score, so at least Jeannie had  _that_ on her side, she figured.

" _Come on_ , sunshine, tell me what's gotcha'  _so glum_." Jack faked a pout, his lower lip jutted out, and eyes sparkling across at her.

Jeannette sighed, mirroring his position. " _Well_ …" His brows raised, urging her, "It's just…" She trailed off hopelessly.

" _Oh_ , now, don't  _make_ me force it outta' you _,_  angel." Jack reached out quickly to pinch at her arm, playfully.

" _Dammit_ ,  _Jack!_ " He pulled away at her sudden outburst of frustration, and Jeannie withdrew, crossing her arms and looking around with a blush to make sure nobody had heard. Sure enough, a group of girls that stood under an umbrella, in their bathing suits, glanced toward her, whispering among themselves.

"Sorry, I…" Jeannie took a deep breath, disregarding Jack's concerned stare. "Are you y'know… queer?"  _There_. She'd  _said_ it, it was out in the open,  _voiced_. Jack just stared at her, his eyebrows raised but eyes narrowed. "It's just… You  _know_ I'll  _always_ be here for ya', you can tell me  _anything_ , Jack." His expression didn't change.

_"What?"_ The exasperation on his face wasn't an impression this time.

"..You  _know_ ," Jeannie rolled her eyes, shrugging. "Do you  _prefer_ guys?… Like…  _sexually_?"

"Okay,  _stop_." His waved his arm like he was washing away the topic.

"So, you're  _not_?" Jeannie, bit her lip in anticipation, tilting her head at him.

Jack drummed his fist on the table, looking away from her, "I'm… I don't  _know_." Jack whispered, tapping his closed hand against his jaw in thought and anxiety. "I'm  _sure_ that if I… were to  _connect_ with someone, and that someone happened to be a  _guy_ … that I'd be  _alright_ with it. But, I've only ever found  _one_ person I genuinely  _like_ spending time with…" His dark brown eyes met her's, before flickering away, again. And, oh.

_Oh_. "So, no.  _Not_ gay. Just not exactly  _straight_ either, I suppose." Jack finally finished. His fingers laced together and he propped them up under his chin. "What brought  _that_ on, anyhow?" Jeannie looked away, focused her eyes on the clear water of the pool.

"I mean, I guess I just don't  _get it_ …" Another sigh escaped her, "you're  _real_ good looking, Jack. You could have  _any_ girl you wanted." His brow furrowed at this, but she knew he was at least a  _little_ flattered. "And, I mean, we're at a  _pool_ party… with half naked girls  _everywhere_ … You haven't stared…  _at all_ … not  _once_."

As though they'd been summoned a flock of girls, clad in only their bikinis, sauntered by beside the two. Jack's eyes never left her's. "I just don't  _care_ about that kind of stuff,  _Jeannie_."  _Jack just didn't think that way._ Jeannie wondered when he'd started looking at  _her_ like she was the last person on Earth.

Instead she laughed, to ease the tension, and pretended she didn't notice.


	4. Dirty Little Secret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you celebrate Thanksgiving then Happy Holidays! If not, then just Happy DAY!!!!! Don't forget to rate and review xxx

 

**_ Ninth Year, 1994 _ **

“ _ Jack _ ,” Jeannie sing-songed, fighting a shiver that threatened to trail down her spine from the cool breeze of the crisp winter air. From beneath the thick hood of her coat she grinned widely at him, glancing up from her lashes. She’d been holding her tongue  _ all day _ , it was time for her to let him in on her  _ little secret _ . That  _ little  _ _ secret  _ of Jeannie’s was that her parents would be  _ gone  _ this weekend to visit her beloved Aunt Sadie;she’d have the house  _ all  _ to herself, she’d be  _ alone _ .

_ Unless _ , Jack took the  _ hint  _ and just  _ happened  _ to show up, unannounced. Who was  _ she  _ to deny her  _ best-est _  friend in the whole wide  _ world  _ entry into her empty home in the middle of the night? Why that would be  _ barbaric _ . Jeannie simply wouldn’t  _ stand  _ for it. A sly grin crossed her face, and her cheeks grew rosy from the thought of being alone with Jack. _  Oh, the possibilities _ .

Jeannie jumped as she realized Jack had been staring at her with his eyebrows raised, watching her expressions and waiting for her to snap out of her lewd daydreams, and  _ finally  _ notice him. Of course, Jack had no way of  _ knowing  _ her thoughts were anything but pure-except the glaringly obvious blush expanding across her cheeks, and chest, that gave her away  _ completely _ .  

“ _ Well _ , Jeannie? Cat got your tongue?” She heard the little dreamy sigh escape her own lips when he grinned down at her, but didn’t even bother trying to hide it;Jeannie had decided to make what she wanted  _ painfully  _ obvious, then there was  _ no way  _ he wouldn’t at  _ least  _ get the hint .

“ _ Hmm _ ..  _ noooo _ . But, I  _ do  _ have some _  exciting news _ …” Jeannie said cryptically, skipping ahead happily and patiently waiting for him to take the bait. She  _ knew  _ he couldn’t resist, but it wouldn’t stop him from being an ass in the meantime, Jeannie looked back just in time to see him roll his eyes and lazily turn to follow her.

“Oh?” He questioned, pouting his lips teasingly at her once he’d caught up. “And does this…  _ exciting  _ news benefit  _ me  _ in anyway?” Jeannie knew he didn’t  _ really  _ care if it had anything to do with him at all, but the fact of the matter was that it  _ did _ . It had  _ everything  _ to do with him. Jeannie tried to ignore the way her heartbeat sped up when he pulled her closer by her wrist.  _ How  _ was he so  _ damn warm  _ in thirty degree weather?

“ _ Well _ , Jack, it  _ depends  _ on how you use this  _ exciting  _ news to your…  _ advantage _ .” Her neck strained from the angle it had to be at in order for her to look up at him, but it was so worth it to see the surprise light up his face.  _ That’s right, Jack. _  Jeannie thought.  _ All the cards are in your hands. _

“And so what  _ is  _ this… what is this  _ news  _ that’s so  _ exciting _ ?”  ** Hook ** .

“My parents are going out of  _ town  _ this weekend, I’m gonna’ be stuck at home…  _ all alone _ .”  ** Line ** .

Jeannie watched as Jack swallowed, his Adam’s apple being her point of interest, he didn’t appear to be nervous though, excited maybe, but not nervous. That was… good. “Well, I could always swing by, keep my darling best friend company on this lonely weekend.”  ** And  ** **_ sinker _ ** **. **

****

Jeannie grinned innocently up at him and placed a not-so-innocent chaste kiss on the calloused palm of his hand _. It’s all part of the plan _ .

-

Jeannie couldn’t remember a time when  _ she  _ was more nervous. Did Jack  _ actually understand  _ her meaning? Would he be  _ prepared _ ? She was sure if she snooped enough in her parent’s room she could find  _ some  _ form of…  _ protection _ , but… did he even really  _ want  _ her like  _ that _ ? Did she want him like  _ that _ ?-Yes,  _ yes  _ she did.  _ Badly _ . She couldn’t think of anyone else she would ever want to be with-there was  _ no one _  else, actually.

Jeannie had busied herself at the microwave, popping some popcorn for the campy horror movie she was about to watch when a loud noise from behind her had the uncooked kernels flying everywhere. She turned around sharply to see Jack sat on the kitchen counter, his feet swinging effortlessly into the wooden cabinet, the sliding door across the room was still haphazardly left open.

“You  _ asshole _ ! You couldn’t have gotten my attention in a nicer way?” Jeannie’s hands found their way to the curve of her hips on their own accord, as she glared at him. Jack just stared back blankly.

“ _ Hey Jen’ _ ,” He stressed her name like a soft whine, “Ang _ el _ . S _ weeeee _ ** t ** __ darling! _  L _ ove of mine… I think you,  _ uh _ … you might’ve  _ dropped  _ something.” He deadpanned, Jeannie did her best to contain the snort of laughter, she really did, but to no avail _. Even if she had-not!-been totally swooning. Nope, definitely. Not.  _ Jack slid from the counter and sauntered toward her, tactfully pinning her against the corner where the island met the cabinets, and craning his neck to meet her eye.

“ _ Hi _ .” Jeannie laughed, blushing girlishly as he pressed the front of his body flush against her’s.

“Hi.” Jack echoed, a genuine smile of his own brightening his features. His dark eyes roamed her face, seeming to trail over her every little feature to note it to memory. It was Jeannie that leaned forward to press her lips against his, and she’d be lying if she said it didn’t feel like every romance she’d ever seen or read put to practice.

Jack’s lips, while,  _ admittedly _ , a bit chapped from the cold, were soft when he leaned down further to keep her from losing her balance while she stood, trembling, on her tip toes. It was comforting to know he was allowing her to set the pace, Jack knew better than anybody that Jeannie didn’t like being pressured. Into anything.

She practically melted against him when he brought his hand up to caress her face. It wasn’t her first kiss, unfortunately, but Jeannie knew for a fact that Jack Napier would be her last. There was no way she was going to let him go after  _ this _ . She also knew that if he didn’t  _ pull away  _ then she would pass out from lack of oxygen, but when she felt his tongue test the barrier of her lips it was quickly decided that she would be a fool to try to pull away then. Jeannie draped her arms around his neck, unsure herself of whether she was doing it to yank him closer, pull herself  _ to  _ him, or to just get him to slide her onto the counter.

In any case, it worked in her favor when she was no longer stepping in popcorn kernels and she could  _ finally  _ wind her legs around Jack’s waist. She’d never admit to the blush that was spreading across her body due to the fact she could  _ feel  _ him straining against his jeans. Also, offhand, she  _ really  _ wished he would stop smoking;he tasted like cigarettes and coffee-not that the  _ last  _ part minded, at least she  _ liked  _ coffee.

Despite kissing before Jeannie had never actually  _ done  _ much more than a simple  _ little  _ peck.  _ So _ , ‘ _ technically speaking’  _ her  _ first  _ kiss with  _ Jack  _ was special in the way that his tongue- _ W _ _ as he massaging her tongue with his? _ -was,  _ well _ , she wasn’t sure exactly  _ where  _ he’d  _ learned  _ that from, but it felt  _ amazing _ . That brought up the question in her mind; _ What else was Jack experienced in that she wasn’t? _  She had thought that they would both go into…  _ this _ , whatever ‘ _ this’  _ was, with close to the same amount of knowledge. Apparently not.

Jeannie broke away from Jack for what he thought had been to catch her breath-it was, but  _ also _ -she held her hand up when he moved back toward her. His brow wrinkled in confusion and Jeannie tried not to get distracted by the look in his brown eyes. He was adorable; _ perfect _ . She shook her head at thst to clear the thought away. “W-Where… What the  _ hell _ ?” Was all Jeannie had managed to get out when she finally tried to form any coherent words. Jack smiled at her, looking a bit smug-albeit, confused-at his work of her red, swollen lips.

“Where’d you…  _ What _ ?” Jeannie mumbled jutting out her lower lip in frustration, she glared as best she could at him beneath her lashes, but the blush tainting her face didn’t make it seem very believable. Jack actually let out a small laugh at this, not one with malicious intent, but boyish modesty. “ _ Jaaaaack _ .” Jeannie sniveled, shoving at his shoulder halfheartedly.

“I can’t  _ answer  _ a question that you haven’t  _ asked _ , love.” He captured her face with his hands again, so that he could rest his forehead against her’s.

“How do you know how to…  _ do  _ that?” As soon as it appeared Jeannie wanted to punch that little smirk from his face, but contained her anger, she would have to at least wait long enough to get an answer out of him. Instead of physical abuse she decided on whining some more. “ _ Jaaaaaaack _ !”

Jack winced before grinning again, she couldn’t remember a time he’d smiled so much in a single sitting and also felt thrilled that she was a part of that. “ _ Jeeeeannie, _ ” He mimicked cruelly, but stopped when she turned away, sliding back on the counter to pout, again. “Hey, now. I was just doing what  _ felt  _ right, alright Jen’?” Jack pulled her back toward him so that he was once again positioned between her thighs.

Jeannie’s eyes softened when she looked up at him before narrowing suspiciously. “Yeah, you  _ promise _ ?” She thrust her pinky finger out toward him as threateningly as one possibly could. Jack dropped his head at this, chuckling before lacing his much larger pinky around her’s. Jeannie was instantly smiling again, edging closer to press her lips to his.

“I  _ also  _ mighta’ had some practice with that senior chick,  _ Vicky _ , once, but, I mean, it doesn’t  _ really  _ count because I actually  _ care  _ about you.” She found herself in honest shock that he’d gotten the entire sentence out and had still managed to slip his tongue across the roof of her mouth. Despite the shiver that went down her spine without her permission, she did a good job of pulling away fast enough to escape any real temptation of his lips..

“ _ Jack _ !” Jeannie growled, he dodged around her when she swung at him and she missed  _ just  _ by a hair. At first she was truly annoyed at Jack’s lack of remorse toward the subject. But, she herself had kissed before, as well, and it wouldn’t do to be hypocritical.  _ What did it matter, anyway? _

__

Jeannie soon found herself laughing too as she chased him around her kitchen at nearly one in the morning swinging various items of silverware and making ridiculous, taunting faces at one another.


End file.
